Let her eat cake

Photo Credit: Mark Brooke

As of his first birthday he said four words, clearly audible mama, dada, and eat. The fourth not so much a word, as it was a side-to-side head motion prompted by the word no, so I did what any good parent would do, and interpreted that as him saying no. Still two words less than the ten-month-old girl who along with her parents sat beside me.

I made small talk with her mom. The baby girl sat quietly in her high chair as the waiter packed my food to go. Buggy grew frustrated, tried to free himself from the high chair, and began to cry. The little girl's mom then said “she’s just this way, always has been, loves to go out and to be around lots of people.” I was tired, I had exhausted every strategy I knew and still no luck, her comment was insult to injury. My attempt to rationalize her words with every kid is different hadn’t worked. I ate two bites and had to leave while she ate an entire meal and was now ordering dessert.

Later that evening I thought, why weren’t his three words enough, why did I have to bolster his word count to four? Why was her eating a meal and dessert so irritating? I wanted to be introspective; I wanted to know why I felt this way, but that desire was lost somewhere in between a tantrum when Buggy flailed his body wildly refusing to be soothed.  After several minutes that felt like hours he stopped and said mama and in that moment if that were the only word he could say that would be fine.

What I thought I would realize immediately I discovered weeks later.  Maybe her child was accustomed to eating at restaurants and maybe she was “just that way” because of routine. I never considered taking small steps instead of giant leaps; maybe getting ice cream or coffee rather than a full meal will be easier for the both of us.  I needed to be patient allowing Buggy’s experience to become routine.  And maybe one day I can have my cake and eat it too.

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